Naij.com recently encountered Nollywood star actress Omoni Oboli, the mother of three has been married for 15 years and her marriage is still hot as new. The actress who recently premiered her new movie First Lady has advice for any hoping to marry a celebrity and those married to celebrities. She also talked about how she has been able to keep her marriage and be on top her her career.
You are among the few married actress that have been able to sustain their marriage in Nollywood, what is the secret?
I was just saying to somebody some minutes ago, for me I think the biggest thing is the communication between us and the fact that we both decide early in the marriage that we are in this forever. So if you know you would be in it forever you are going to doing everything to make it work. And the fact that we can talk to each other, we can figure out what the issues are. It is not like we don't have issues, everyone has issues there is no such thing like perfect marriage, it does not exist so when people are looking for that perfect marriage out there, they are looking for a myth which does not exist. Everyone has issues, how you handle these issues are important. Are these issues going to break the marriage up or make it stronger? So if you have decided you love this person and you are going to be with the person with all his/her imperfections because nobody is perfect. You are not even perfect so why are you looking for the perfect person. So if you have decided you are going to have that then you make it work somehow or the other.
For How long have you been married?
I've been married for almost 15 years.
How have you been able to balance it up as a wife, a mother and a career woman?
I have always said that you got to do what you got to do. So I know I have got to be a wife and a mum and a career woman. I will not lie to you that it's easy to balance this aspect of one's life but every mother who has to work goes through the same thing. You are joggling so many different balls and you try not to drop any of the balls but the truth is every once in a while you will have to drop one of the balls. What I always say is try not to beat yourself up when that happens try not feel guilty nobody is perfect. So try your best to be everything you can. If you have a good support system that helps a lot, you have a supportive husband that helps a great deal also.
What is your advice to people in the entertainment industry, because it is believed that celebrity ladies are not seen as marriageable?
There are marriageable people in the entertainment industry. They are of different breed and anybody trying to marry or come into any sort of relationship with an entertainer has to understand that it is a different terrain. You need to understand that this person is a celebrity of some sort that means she is going to attract a lot of people from both sexes, so they are going to be out there in a sense. You have got to understand that you are not in competition with this person. This person is a star, she is shining you cannot compete with her; you have to complete them, help them shine. You've got to be their backbone. The minute you begin to think why is everybody looking at my wife? Why is it that she is the one everybody is talking to? Why are they not talking to me? Then you have started having issues already because now you are going to resent that one thing that makes her who she is. That is why you find out that people get married to celebrities and they say you can't act any more. Are you kidding me? You met her acting, one of the reasons you probably liked her was because she is an actress and you are going to tell her to stop acting and she begins to resent you then you start having issues. You have to understand that it's not a competition she is who she is be who you are but at the same time support his/her dreams because it happens the other way round as well.
But we have seen couples who both are entertainers and are supposed to understand themselves better but their marriages still didn't work out. What do you think happened there?
Yes what happens most of the time is they start competing with each other. They start having this 'I am the bigger star' attitude. "Why are you telling me this?" "I am the one everybody is calling" When was the last time you got a call or an endorsement? Things like these happen, they are also human.
Had there being a time in your marriage the stardom got into you and it rocked your union?
The truth is I don't think of myself as a star. Once I get into my house I am like every other mother and wife. The whole celebrity thing does not get to me in any shape or form. I am still me, what I believe is still the same. My kids don't even look at me as a celebrity any way. They know obviously because of the way people treat me when we are out but when we are in the house everybody is normal. "She is mummy; I can jump on her I can tell her what I want to tell her. I can tell her I am hungry." And I have to look for food for them. So for me the whole celebrity thing ends in front of the door. Once I get in I am a regular mum and a regular wife.
The entertainment industry is not as rosy as it used to be what do you think is wrong and what do you think should be done so we can back on track?
Well I cannot say it's not as rosy as it used to be. I think it is actually better. Honestly, we have challenges in Nollywood because of distribution and the whole piracy thing. Aside that I can tell you it is now that we are doing better movies. Piracy has just really grown because our distribution frame work is not on point and that is when piracy strives. If we work on our distribution and make sure there are other avenues and channels to push out these movies we are doing then piracy will reduce and we start making better returns on investment.
How do you recover money invested in movies despite piracy?
There are different ways to make money from a movie; it is not just the cinema. You did the cinema you do online platforms; you do DVDs and other stuffs. So we just got to keep pushing this is, it's our passion. We are not going to stop it because the pirates are there. There is piracy in every movie industry in the world. I mean Hollywood movies you see them on the streets in Nigeria here even when they are still in cinemas abroad. Yes there is piracy but they still have money because they have a big distribution frame work that works so when we do that we will still make money regardless.
So aside being an actress who is Omoli Oboli?
I am a film maker, a script writer as I write my scripts. I direct and produce movies too. I am a wife and a mum. And some other things I can't say.
So all you do is you make movies?
That is a lot, it forms a huge percentage of what I do. I am partly an owner of a company although it is still under entertainment we do rentals. We have lighting equipment that we rent out. We have crew accommodation. Crew and cast accommodation so instead of going to a hostel to sleep we have a lodge.
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